So we know that Empaths often have a hard time recognizing toxic people until it’s too late and we get entangled in a sticky mess with these people and we have to find a way to remove them from our lives but there are some really easy ways to spot even the slickest Narcissist or Psychopath within 2 weeks of meeting them.
First of all know that when you meet a Toxic Person or TP, you won’t meet the real person right away because they will hide their true nature as long as they can but most don’t make it past the two week mark before they start showing their true colors and if you are paying attention you can easily spot them because they always have the same traits.
- They will make harsh comments but profess to be “only joking” and if you take them seriously they will project blame on you for being too sensitive and make you feel like you are being silly despite the blatant jab about you, your family, your passions, etc. Their “jokes” are not “just jokes” & they really do mean what they are saying but it will always be said in “joke form”. This way they can be as rude as they want but it’s “justified” as a joke.
- They may act like they think your family & friends don’t like them even though you don’t see anything to it. This paves the way for them to isolate you later on by creating drama that forces you to chose them over everyone else in your life.
- They talk a lot about the ex and have nothing good to say. They will often label the Ex as “crazy” and they will claim to be victimized and treated unfairly with no responsibility of the breakup on their shoulders, it was all that evil ex’s fault.
- Speaking of the Ex, if you do something they don’t like they will find some way to punish you and then the excuse will be that it “reminds them of something the ex did” that they can’t forgive. Let’s be clear here, you should never pay for someone else’s mistakes so never accept this excuse. For example, your new Partner tells you that you can’t have opposite sex friends anymore because the ex did and it turns out the ex was cheating with one of the friends. You didn’t do that so don’t you pay for it!
- Watch their body language! 90% of communication is non-verbal. Watch for rolling eyes, crossed arms, deep breathes, pacing, running hands through hair, impatience, aggression or dismissal in tone of voice. This is usually the first tell-tale sign.
- Watch how they treat other people. If they treat that waitress excessively badly because she got his order wrong and made a little slip up this is a warning sign.
- Do they have a habit of cutting you off while you are talking? This is a disrespectful habit that will only get worse. It shows their complete lack of regard for you.
- Is sex all about them? If they don’t even seem concerned about your end of things or never ask those things that needs to be asked about your likes/dislikes you have a problem. This isn’t a big red flag but still cause for big concern and must be addressed. If you feel forced into something you really don’t like then it’s an actual alarm.
- It’s 2020 and we are in the Age of Information. Look to see if they have a criminal record before you proceed. Not every single person who has ever made a mistake in life should be disqualified but look for patterns of violent behavior. If you are 1 week into a relationship with someone who has 5 DV charges on their record do you really want to continue a relationship with this person?
- Do they flirt with others in your presence or behind your back? If someone is interested in being with only you they do not need to make sure you see them chasing after others and anytime they are sneaking around that is equally bad. It’s all about RESPECT.
- They become very clingy very fast. You have something they desire and they want to protect that as their own. They don’t get jealous out of love because that in itself is a contradictory term, real Love has no reason to ever be jealous. If they demand a commitment within 2 weeks that is usually never a good sign no matter how they might put it. Yes it does happen fast sometimes when you have met “The One” but that commitment should never feel pressured. If you worry about waiting 2 weeks to commit or you will lose them, that isn’t love.
Now let’s be clear on 2 things. A Narcissist and a Psychopath are two totally different personalities but both fall into the TP category. While a Narcissist is a typical potential pain-in-the-ass abuser, a Psychopath is much more deceiving & dangerous. We talk a lot about Narcissists because they are abundant right now but Psychopaths are everywhere too but they are often mislabeled as Narcissists because they are so good at hiding their true self.
A real Psychopath does not have feelings other than fake forced feelings that can seem very genuine as long as they are getting their way. If you have ever been at the mercy of one there is no mistaking it because when their cover comes off they are as cold as ice and you can literally feel the chill in their energy. They are much more likely to be dangerous enough to seriously harm you without guilt on their part because they do not have that Filter that tells them they are taking things too far. Not every Psychopath is a murderer with an axe, many just like to torture their family & pets in private because they can otherwise function in society.
You won’t see this side of a Psychopath unless you are behind a closed door with one because their whole lives are about staying under control until the right time and they are very good at it so they can “hold their rage in” until they get the privacy to let it out and punish their Victim. They like to appear to the public as a good person. A narcissist on the other hand, doesn’t care who sees what because they assume that the whole world shares their view, that they are in the right and you deserve to be treated badly.
As an Empath you have an advantage if you know how to use it because Energy is something you are sensitive to and if you are paying attention you can easily pick up on these things in the beginnings of a relationships before you get too far in as long as you don’t ignore your Intuition because of the Chemistry that’s making you see rainbows & stars.
I spent 16 years with a complete Narcissist & then I spent 10 more years with a dangerous Psychopath so in this time I learned every single little trick in their book and I don’t want you to fall into the traps I did. I feel that I lived it so that others can learn from it and avoid or escape it easier than I did.
My goal is to teach Spiritually Awakened People a new & better way of life once they experience their Reset because everyone deserves to live a happy & meaningful new life but before you can begin to find this beautiful new life, Past Trauma must be healed so you can escape that Karmic Loop that keeps you in the same situations over & over because you didn’t see the lesson & you didn’t take the time to Heal..
Keep an eye out for future articles on how you can Reset Your Life & start Healing yourself immediately.